Communication Starts with a Thought

As I was listening to Pamela Perkins, Founder and CEO of Human Communication Institute (HCI), speak on “Effective Communication in Your Work and In Your Life” at the SCORE Women’s Networking Breakfast on Friday, I became acutely aware of the messages I was sending. A former college professor, she defined communication as what happens whenever meaning is attributed to behavior, or the residue of behavior.
Pamela asserted that everything starts with a thought.

What was I thinking? I was hoping that I looked like an engaged listener while having a flashback to my Comm. 101 class at University of Arizona. At the same time, I thought about the women I wanted to connect with before leaving the event and all of the projects that I needed to complete before the weekend.
Communication is an inside-out process. Thoughts spur actions.

How was my intrapersonal communication affecting my behavior and the message I was sending? Sitting up straight with my legs crossed, I took notes, made eye contact and laughed at the appropriate times during Pamela’s presentation. I made a conscious effort to show signs of receptive listening and hope that is how the speaker and fellow listeners interpreted my behavior. My other thoughts only affected future action. I did connect with the women I wanted to meet before rushing off to face the day. Luckily, my experience in Comm 101 was positive, so I don’t think it affected by behavior. However, I can imagine that a negative memory would alter one’s posture, expression, tone, etc. In turn, others attribute meaning to my behaviors based on their own thoughts. What a cycle!

I left the breakfast determined to be aware of what I communicate. I do a quick check on myself by asking these two questions:

• What am I thinking?

• What are my actions communicating?

Remember, communication starts with a thought by both the sender and receiver. What are your actions, or others’ interpretations of your behaviors, telling you about your thoughts? Let us know how this translates into your professional life.